i dont even use tumblr.. except when i want to just write something. writing things out can be soothing. just to lay all your thoughts down. i want a different blog. i think im going to get wordpress or something. no mo tumblr.
my last thought.
the most difficult thing for me is.. just. not being enough. to be the older sister to my three younger siblings they deserve. to be a good & helpful daughter. to be a selfless & supportive girlfriend. to be a loving friend. to be an encouraging sister in christ. to be a full-time student with a part-time job. all the while trying to be cautious with my every move with hawks’ eyes just preying over me. and being aware of whats going on but i just have to sit and watch. and it’s as if someone is always left feeling neglected/hurt/burnt out because i cant be super-Bo. i wish i could do it all. im so. so. SO. tired of feeling guilty in whatever i do. i so want to do everything whole-heartedly. but everything is pulling me apart in a million directions, how can i? im doing one thing and 3 other things yell my name to be attended to. i guess this just means i need more breather’s with jesus. but still. thank You God. for all that you have provided. and the joy above all. and i know im enough in your eyes
From my friend, Eric’s blog. Blessed me!!
By ‘someone at lighthouse’ anon. (translated also in/from Korean)
I dreamed I had an interview with God.
“So you would like an interview with me?” God asked.
“If you have the time,” I said.
God smiled.
“My time is eternity… What…
I’ve officially mastered getting ready in 10 minutes before sprinting out the door for 9 am class. sweet =)
oh sweet summer come to mama!!!
thank you Jesus for listening to my prayers.
힘내<3
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Realizing more and more that words of encouragement, life, and love are so powerful.
woah tumblr is changed a lil.
it is 9:49pm and I’m sitting in bed studying on this lovely night. i have the windows up because it was too dang hot! but i sprayed the windows to keep the bugs at bay. it feels and smells like a summer night. i hear cars passing by with their music blasting. i kinda wanna be fifteen again. so weird that im gonna be 21 in less than 3 months. i wish i could just jump in the pool right now and daze off to music (I wanna say Drake lol) with my friends’ laughters in the background. athens, you make me feel like im so alone. if i could just do whatever i wanted right now! if only, if onlyy… but im not. cuz i wont.
i feel like a boy. i never wanted my hair to be long again like now. i want it to just freaking grow out already. i look so much more like a girl with long hair. and i like being a girl.
happy February
Everyone go to www.documentarywire.com and watch Sicko. Sad but everyone should know the level of corruptness of HMO’s in the United States!!!!!!!!!!!!
Brian: oh look it’s Emerald
Me: you mean Emeril?.. haha ….. emerald is my birth stone
Brian: I thought that was my birth stone
ahaha no it’s mine lol.
Apple has the best customer service in the world. I got 2 free replacement chargers for my mac :D and and my parking citation at school got appealed WAHOO!~ and i want to go camping asap. made a homemade fire pit and grilled meat yesterday.. It was so epic and the excitement of making fire is so fun~~ my baby bro kept putting on my uggs saying how great it is to wear when he goes to get the mail. such a funny sight. it like goes up to his butt haha
From my blog.
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The Bible doesn’t say you were doing sort of well until God showed up who makes you sort of better.
The Bible says you were dead.
Before Jesus, every word you spoke was to impress people, give off an image, manipulate, dominate, terrorize, reciprocate, pretend you were someone you are not, get something out of someone, full of agenda and ulterior motives; you spoke out of guilt, fear, shame, anger, hurt, stress, anxiety, pressure; it was self-orbiting, self-centered, self-absorbed, self-serving, with no end goal; purposeless, aimless, directionless, a means to an end that was just another means, using and abusing, distorting, protecting yourself from trouble or exposure; always justifying, rationalizing, making excuses; without destiny or a destination; not building or lifting or encouraging for its own sake but making an empire for yourself that is collapsible the second your words were found to be false; which of course, they always were, because you were dead.
After Jesus, you were set free to joyfully serve others in the same way you were served; you didn’t need to fight for someone else’s approval because all your approval, validation, affirmation, qualification, and restoration was found in Him; you broke out of agendas and manipulation and conceitedness and self-indulgence; you considered other peoples’ interests better than your own; you didn’t need anything from anyone because your ultimate need was already fulfilled; you could speak truth without fear, grace without suspicion, love without expectation, encouragement without reparations, beauty without flattery; your speech was unencumbered and unhindered by the desperate impulse to impress your idols; your words had the divine calling to create, inspire, lead, exhort, edify, rebuke, discipline, confess, admit, be vulnerable, be real; your words were the aroma of Christ, the song of Heaven, a breath of fresh air; which of course, is not because of you, but because you were made alive.
As for you, you were dead in your transgressions and sins, in which you used to live when you followed the ways of this world and of the ruler of the kingdom of the air, the spirit who is now at work in those who are disobedient. All of us also lived among them at one time, gratifying the cravings of our sinful nature and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature objects of wrath. But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions — it is by grace you have been saved. And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, in order that in the coming ages he might show the incomparable riches of his grace, expressed in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus.
– Ephesians 2:1-7Lovely.
A-freaking-men
LOL my 19 y.o brother got a letter in the mail from the director of 2012 miss teen to let him know that he is eligible to participate in this year’s competition. everyone in my fam is making fun of him ahhaha
tim: i asked mom to buy me BOY fuzzy socks but they only had girl ones so i got them anyway
LOL he loves them
MY NUMBER ONE FAVORITE. EVER.
EVER EVER EVER. in the Bible is MARTHA. I love her SO much. She is the best. It always upsets me how people picture Mary vs Martha as good vs bad but I think Martha is so. great. I know exactly where she is coming from and I know her genuine heart for God. How she gets back on her feet and seeks and seeks. I LOVE MARTHA :)
this really truly sums up my thoughts so greatly
